Leaders Don’t Go Bowling… A Note to Self

Dear Liza,

I know that it’s hard.  You’re passionate, you get excited about ideas, and you want things to move quickly.  But when you’re passionate, excited and quick-moving, something happens.  You go bowling.  (I know you really don’t like bowling, so this is the perfect analogy for you.)


You don’t go bowling for pins, but for people.  Not every day and not intentionally, but when it does happen, the effect is still the same:

  • People are talking, and you cut them off because you’re so excited about getting your thought out.
  • You settle on an idea before getting everyone’s input. (If they felt strongly enough about what they’re thinking, they’d speak up, right?)
  • Acquaintances are interested in getting to know you better, but you’re so deep in thought that you walk right by them. (Truth – because, in that moment, what you’re thinking about is more important to you than they are.)
  • You have such a clear picture in your head about what the outcome of a project needs to be, that when someone else steers it another direction, it’s hard for you to accept.


Liza, when you’re around, things get done and they get done well.  BUT, during those times when you go bowling, other things are happening too:

  • People feel like all you care about is your opinion on something.
  • They don’t feel like you value their ideas.
  • You miss out on building deeper relationships — relationships that could help you “go further, faster“.
  • You don’t allow people to fully own a project or even to fail and learn from their mistakes because you want it done your way; otherwise, it’s not “perfect”.


What to do?  Hit the pause button!  Put the bowling ball down.  Look around you at the incredible people that God has placed among you.  Gather in all information, and THEN push forward.


Enter the Sphere. Reply here.

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